As a developing estrogen-tipped missile with a more ‘dignified’ boss, it makes me feel better that it can be an effective mentoring style. I’ve never had a mentor like that, and it made me worry that it was wrong, ineffective and needed to be eradicated. Maybe I can find a way to combine the two…
Amazing post. I had an amazing female thesis supervisor and an amazing female post doc supervisor. Although very different in their mentoring styles from one another, they too pushed and pulled me through and I owe them my career. Yes they treated me differently than their male trainees and yes it pissed me off at the time. But as Isis says….they did it for very good reasons. Now, I too cannot be the quiet dignified type. Thank you Isis for writing with such clarity and perception. I am delighted you remain such a strong voice in the blogosphere.
Also completely echoe with her experience about finding post-doc while pregnant. I had very similar experience when I was moving from Europe to USA and I was looking for a post-doc position. I had a correspondence with a very known PI in an MRU. He was very excited and wrote me a very long email what amazing things his lab is doing and what I can do in his lab once I am there (I was coming from a known group with high recommendation), until I told him (very naively) that I have a toddler and probably will need some time to settle down (and find child care etc) in the new country. That was it. He never replied any of my emails back.
I’ll admit that I have sometimes been harder on women that I have thought had potential.
I’m hardest on people who have potential (male or female). If you are not (yet) a world class scientist I’ll give you a few “wax on, wax off” exercises to go and do on your own. If, on the other hand, you seem to have world class potential then I’ll spend all my time in the dojo, erh, I mean lab, correcting even slight mistakes since at that might one day make the difference.
I’ve seen comparably talented students with widely diverging career successes due to the lack of attention-to-detail finishing-school supervision.
For the record though, Medium does allow comments. They get put in line with the text though, which is different than the format WordPress uses. Hover your mouse to the right of the text and you’ll see a little plus sign. You can use that you leave your comment.
DrugMonkey 
May 31, 2013 at 10:48 am
What kinda motherfucken blogge doesn’t allow comments!?!?!?!? What the fucken fucke is that buulshhittte????
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May 31, 2013 at 10:51 am
And that is a fucken great poste!!!!
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May 31, 2013 at 10:53 am
Right?!!??
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May 31, 2013 at 10:53 am
can not comment there, so putting it here. Yes, the rules are different for men and women. Absolutely best from her and very true.
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May 31, 2013 at 1:59 pm
Thank you Isis.
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May 31, 2013 at 5:39 pm
Srsly, omgerd y can i no haz comments?
As a developing estrogen-tipped missile with a more ‘dignified’ boss, it makes me feel better that it can be an effective mentoring style. I’ve never had a mentor like that, and it made me worry that it was wrong, ineffective and needed to be eradicated. Maybe I can find a way to combine the two…
LikeLike
May 31, 2013 at 7:52 pm
Amazing post. I had an amazing female thesis supervisor and an amazing female post doc supervisor. Although very different in their mentoring styles from one another, they too pushed and pulled me through and I owe them my career. Yes they treated me differently than their male trainees and yes it pissed me off at the time. But as Isis says….they did it for very good reasons. Now, I too cannot be the quiet dignified type. Thank you Isis for writing with such clarity and perception. I am delighted you remain such a strong voice in the blogosphere.
LikeLike
June 1, 2013 at 4:39 am
Also completely echoe with her experience about finding post-doc while pregnant. I had very similar experience when I was moving from Europe to USA and I was looking for a post-doc position. I had a correspondence with a very known PI in an MRU. He was very excited and wrote me a very long email what amazing things his lab is doing and what I can do in his lab once I am there (I was coming from a known group with high recommendation), until I told him (very naively) that I have a toddler and probably will need some time to settle down (and find child care etc) in the new country. That was it. He never replied any of my emails back.
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June 2, 2013 at 11:10 am
I’ll admit that I have sometimes been harder on women that I have thought had potential.
I’m hardest on people who have potential (male or female). If you are not (yet) a world class scientist I’ll give you a few “wax on, wax off” exercises to go and do on your own. If, on the other hand, you seem to have world class potential then I’ll spend all my time in the dojo, erh, I mean lab, correcting even slight mistakes since at that might one day make the difference.
I’ve seen comparably talented students with widely diverging career successes due to the lack of attention-to-detail finishing-school supervision.
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June 2, 2013 at 6:34 pm
Thanks for the feedback, dudes. I appreciate it.
For the record though, Medium does allow comments. They get put in line with the text though, which is different than the format WordPress uses. Hover your mouse to the right of the text and you’ll see a little plus sign. You can use that you leave your comment.
XOXOXO to you all.
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June 12, 2013 at 6:58 pm
trite. And I thought she finally quit blogging? Couldn’t do without the narcissistic supply I guess.
“I went back largely because he was adorable and I really had nothing better to do.
A few years later, he decided that we were going to graduate school.”
nauseating. People actually identify with this?
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